Natalie White has a wound that will never heal.
Her 19-year-old son was killed in a motorcycle accident two years ago and White says the loss still fills her with a numbing pain that will never go away.
The Langley City mother has been waiting since then to find out the details of what actually happened in the accident.
White91Ƶs son died June 20, 2018 when his motorcycle collided with an SUV on 181A Street at the 61B Avenue intersection.
But in the ensuing court case, a stay of proceedings was entered and the case never went to trial. With no court hearing, White said, the family was denied closure, with no opportunity to hear the driver91Ƶs account of the event, and whether he had any regrets to express.
White had always wanted to hear from the other driver, to find out what happened and to help her find some closure.
What White didn91Ƶt know was the other driver was desperate to find some closure too.
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When White reached out in early June in an effort to contact the other driver, that driver, Johnny Forrest was thankful.
91ƵWhen I saw that article in the Cloverdale Reporter, it made my day,91Ƶ said Forrest, a Cloverdale resident. 91ƵShe showed compassion toward me. I wanted to find some closure as well.91Ƶ
White and Forrest finally got that closure when they met just days before the two-year anniversary of Andrew91Ƶs death.
91ƵCan I give you a hug?91Ƶ White asked, tears streaming down her cheeks.
91ƵI wanted to do this two years ago,91Ƶ Forrest replied, as the two embraced. 91ƵFor me this is closure too. I wanted to show you some compassion and love. I can91Ƶt thank you enough.91Ƶ
Forrest and White met in the common room of White91Ƶs complex.
91ƵI wanted you to know that I don91Ƶt blame you,91Ƶ said White.
91ƵI91Ƶve never been the same,91Ƶ Forrest said, his thick Scottish accent muffled underneath a facemask. 91ƵEver since then, I can91Ƶt go on that road anymore.91Ƶ
Forrest expressed his 91Ƶdeepest regrets91Ƶ for what had happened that day and explained to White how he saw the crash unfold.
91ƵI was taking my granddaughter home and I was making a left-hand turn,91Ƶ remembered Forrest, now 85. 91ƵI could see your son coming up the road and I says, 91ƵBoy! He91Ƶs a-movin.91Ƶ You know?91Ƶ
Forrest said he was stopped, waiting for Futerko to pass when Forrest91Ƶs granddaughter cried out, 91ƵPapa John, his handlebars are wobbling.91Ƶ
That91Ƶs when Forrest said Futerko91Ƶs bike changed course and collided head on with Forrest91Ƶs bumper.
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Forrest said he then did something he shouldn91Ƶt have. He said his granddaughter was screaming and he had to get her out of there.
91ƵI reversed my car, went way back, and then around, and parked my car on the side road,91Ƶ he explained.
Forrest said the crash affected his heart and he had to get a heart valve replaced.
91ƵI91Ƶll never get over it,91Ƶ Forrest added.
The two talked a lot about the facts of the accident. White wondered about all the little details of the collision and everything that led up to it.
She kept wondering what 91Ƶ if anything 91Ƶ could have gone differently that day, or in those final moments, and changed the outcome of her son91Ƶs life. What could have prevented him from being on that road at that precise instant? What minor thing could have altered his final moments and given Andrew more time?
91ƵHe had a lot on his mind that day,91Ƶ explained White. 91ƵHis brain was elsewhere. He was supposed to go to grad that night with a girl and he cancelled on her.91Ƶ
White said Andrew had spoken with the girl just before the crash and had told her he would call her when he got home.
91ƵI feel like he was probably thinking about that and not paying attention to the road.91Ƶ
White said the last two years have been very hard for her. She keeps little reminders of Andrew around because she91Ƶs scared of losing precious memories. She has a locket with a picture of her and her son and she has his name tattooed on her arm. She91Ƶs getting another tattoo June 20 of some artwork Andrew made when he was a little boy.
She said she didn91Ƶt go to the spot where Andrew died until a month after the accident.
White said many have tried to comfort her by telling her it was just an accident. But White said if she views it as an accident, she will just want to assign blame and that will make her angry.
91ƵI do believe, 100 per cent, that that was his day,91Ƶ said White, choking back tears. 91ƵThat91Ƶs what I have to believe in my heart. Or else, the only other thing is to blame you 91Ƶ or him. Or me for allowing him to ride that bike. I didn91Ƶt want him to ride that thing and I didn91Ƶt know how to stop him. I beat myself up every day about that.91Ƶ
91ƵThis is how I91Ƶve gotten my peace,91Ƶ White added, eeking out her words through tears. 91ƵI wanted to try to share that with you: that was his day.91Ƶ
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91ƵThat date91Ƶs gonna be in my head the rest of my life,91Ƶ said Forrest. 91ƵI91Ƶm like you. I91Ƶm trying to heal too and get over the shock of it. It was a shock!91Ƶ he exclaimed.
91ƵI will never be the same person,91Ƶ Forrest added. 91ƵI91Ƶm trying to heal, but I never will because I was part of that tragic situation.91Ƶ
As White and Forrest conversed, they discovered that White91Ƶs dad grew up in Scotland 91Ƶ not far from where Forrest had grown up. (White subsequently passed along Forrest91Ƶs phone number to her father in Ontario and the two had a long chat about life and Scotland.)
And they talked about Andrew.
91ƵHe was a funny character. I91Ƶd love to show you some videos of him, if we can meet again,91Ƶ said White. 91ƵWhen he was happy.91Ƶ
White shared that Andrew loved playing video games and he was a big practical joker. She said he played rugby and had gone to Scotland on a rugby tour in his senior year of high school at Lord Tweedsmuir.
91ƵI don91Ƶt think he cared too much about rugby,91Ƶ laughed White. 91ƵI think he just wanted to go on the trip. (Laughs again). I seriously think that.91Ƶ
White told Forrest that Andrew also played rugby because he loved his rugby coach, Tweedsmuir teacher Jamie Overgaard.
91ƵIf it wasn91Ƶt for Jamie 91Ƶ in high school 91Ƶ I don91Ƶt know what would have become of my son,91Ƶ she said. 91ƵThat man loved my boy and he gave him love and guidance. And my son was not an easy boy to deal with. He was a hard kid to handle, but he was a good kid. He was different. Jamie took a shine to him.91Ƶ
White said Overgaard had the idea to start a fundraiser in Andrew91Ƶs name. So they started the Esta Bueno Rugby Fundraiser. The fundraiser helps Grade 12 rugby players at Lord Tweedsmuir by offsetting costs for overseas rugby tours. (The third annual event will be held at Cloverdale91Ƶs Beaver Lodge sometime in the fall.)
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91ƵAt the first fundraiser, I thanked Jamie for loving my boy and he said that91Ƶs why he91Ƶs a teacher, to be there for boys like mine.91Ƶ
White said when Andrew was in Grade 11 he also went on a rugby tour to Smith Falls, Ont.
91ƵMy parents live there and they got to see him play,91Ƶ said White. 91ƵThey normally wouldn91Ƶt have been able to see him play.91Ƶ
White said Andrew scored the winning try in one of the games and made it into the Smith Falls paper.
White added that it may seem strange, but she thinks there91Ƶs a reason Andrew died on 181A Street.
91ƵThat was Andrew91Ƶs route 91Ƶ obviously he took it that day 91Ƶ but he grew up on that street. He walked on that road. He rode a bicycle on that road. He learned to drive on that road. And he died on that road.
91ƵThat road has so many memories. I feel like that road was at the heart of who he was.91Ƶ
91Ƶ with a file from Dan Ferguson.
editor@cloverdalereporter.com
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